Strewth...

(Photo by Cally,'Unofficial Tony Robinson Site').

My garden has not been touched since December and it looks neglected,sad and full of archaeologists;the japanese sniper was repatriated after the last tidy up.So Mrs.Catto and I decided to buy a strimmer and looked 'price dropped' free catalogue.A lovely little cordless one for £20-00,bargain!internet check for availability...out of stock.Try slightly further afield...out of stock.Try,just to confirm my suspicions...out of stock.My suspicions...it's spring and I am a typical Brit.It's April and a bit of sunshine,GARDEN!!!Everyone else has the same idea and strimmers are just not in the store.But if I order on-line and pay extra for delivery they are available.It's not a conspiracy, I could be more organised and buy these things when most people have their minds elsewhere i.e December.
"You off to the Christmas party mate?"
"No,I am off to purchase a garden strimmer,a barbeque set, several gnomes and 7 cwt of grass seed".
"What!!!"
Of course I'll go to the party and spend the money on networking before alcohol breeches the barrier of commonsense and I tell the chief exec. he's an anally retentive muppet with the social skills of a mongoose.
So we are off to B&Q to peruse their aisles and I just know we will overspend on 'other necessaries' for the garden.The one necessary I continue to look for is rude gnomes.I saw one in a garden flashing a large purple appendage and I immediately thought of christmas presents for aged aunts and vicars:perfect.They'll deliver them wrapped in brown paper.So if anyone knows of such company, such as 'Gnomes with Knobs' please let me know.
Orf to shop TTFN.